Who let the dogs out?

I'm taking a break from my essay to write this post. The essay is kicking my butt. I think I have enough to back up what I'm saying...but I don't know what the lecturer is looking for with the paper. I'm doing it on globalization, but I'm taking a more cultural look at it and now that I'm about half way finished I have this strange feeling he's going to want a more political view on it (something I don't know enough to write about) and there's too much recent history going on at the moment for me to keep up and understand it all at the same time. So for now I'll just stick to what I have and cross my fingers when I turn it in.

But, in other news - I went to the Greyhound dog races yesterday night. I only took 10pounds with me, and to get in set me back a 5er. So anyway, the friends that I went with explained how you bet on the dogs; when you enter they give you a racecard with all the races, all the dogs, and which is the 'best bet'. Well...I didn't exactly want to play like that. So I bet on which names I liked the best. Here are some examples of the ones I bet on - "Cooblers Doodle," "Ninja Magic," "Jack don't Start," "Quivers Blaze," "Ice Flash," "Fintona Falcon," "Bankers John," "Never Ever Stop," "Isadora," "Fantasy Flight," "Quivers Floss," "Pennys Sonata," "Amandas Summer," "Firpits Matt," "Lively Feller," and "Firpits Paddy." - I just thought they were fun!

Well, all of the guys started making fun of me for betting on just the names, they tried to teach me the 'strategy' of the race. Turns out my 'strategy' was a little better than theirs, because I ended up winning money in the end. Not just a little money - I won 30pounds!!! How exciting is that? REALLY exciting! I can see how racing and betting can become addictive though... I think I'll pace myself before I go back there.

After the race I went back to my friend Lance's house (the guy who invited me) with his girlfriend and about 5 other people. We got there, and made a dash to get some food. When we got back we pulled out some cards and chips and started playing Texas Hold 'Em. I had a lot of fun!!! We played untill 3:30 am. I played darts and watched Family Guy and listented to conversations...in a small way it reminded me of home. Everybody was just hanging out, being themselves. It was the first time in awhile that I felt genuinly happy out here on a Saturday night.

Even though I have a cold (and staying out till 4am wasn't the brightest thing to do) I'm really glad I went out! Ok. Now I need to get back to my paper.

silence

I watched Grease tonight for the first time in a couple of years. Wow. What a difference the real version is from the version my mom recorded off the TV when I was younger - that movie is all about sex! You see, when you've watched the censored version your whole life you miss out on what actually happens in the movie. I don't know if I like the way Sandra Dee changed for Danny Zucko - we shouldn't have to change who we are... to be liked. To be fair, I suppose Danny changed too, becoming a 'jock' and all. That's enough of that. I'm not going to sit here and analyze Grease..I'm too tired for that. I will say one last thing though, I really enjoyed watching it again, the music is great and I caught myself wishing I could go back in time to a dance like they had... just good clean fun.

Tomorrow I have the training for my new job all day. It's PAID training, so I shouldn't complain. After that's over I'm meeting a few friends of mine from my course. We're going to see some grayhound dog race...apparently it's really big over here...I'll let you know.

Natalie and I got our flight and hostel (The Flying Pig) for Amsterdam, and I'm wicked excited. I found out that The Ann Frank Museum is there, and I REALLY want to see that. It's the actual house that she hid from the Nazi's in. Actually, seeing that is almost higher than tasting what else Amsterdam is known for. When I was younger and read Ann Frank I remember thinking that she was the bravest and most amazing person for being able to write down everything she was thinking and doing, during such a terrible time. In a way, I think she inspired me to want to write. Sometimes I think to myself that if I were to suddenly die, at least people would know what I was thinking. That might sound kinda of morbid, but it comforts me.

You know what else comforts me? The thought that in just about 4 months or so, I won't have to live in this tiny box anymore!!! It's been a fine room, but I'm not going to miss it, not one bit. I don't think I'm a really messy person, but this room seriously is so cluttered it's not even funny.

I'm going to make this my permanent journal. But not now. Because I'm too tired. And not tomorrow because i'll be too busy. But maybe Sunday. Maybe. But as for now. I'm going to sleep.

good night

You know how I know when I'm sick? I sleep, a lot. I woke up at a decent hour, went to the library and got some work done, and then I went back home, had some lunch and fell asleep for four hours. FOUR!!! I missed my workshop...oops.

Tonight was a good night (still not over though) I came home from the lectures I did go to and made me a salad, some pizza with ranch dressing (mmmmm!!!!!), poured myself a glass of wine and sat down to watch Alias. Gotta love it. I love wine.

My eyes have seriously been glued to http://kievster.blogspot.com - check it out if you have some free time on your hands. I really should be looking over what I'm going to say for my presentation tomorrow, but all I really want to do is go to sleep...

more snow

I can't remember if I talked about the snow here, or on the blurty...if memory serves me right, it was blurty. Anywho...it snowed again here today - and it's supposed to snow more tomorrow. I'm tired of this weather - I want the sun!!! To be completely honest with you, I'm really glad I'm going home during the summer. I love New Mexico in the summer time. Come to think of it...I love New Mexico, period.

I've been really bored lately...mostly from the fact that I'm just procrastinating with actually doing anything productive. I don't know why I don't do it..it just seems pointless to me for some reason. No worries, I'll get my butt into gear and start it soon. The sooner the better, I don't want to be freaking out because I waited too long.

Right. Back on track. To cure my boredom I find myself looking at random blogs. Seriously, before I know it, I'm going through random blogs (the top right hand corner). I found a really interesting one. There's this boy (don't know his age or anything about him) named Jonathan. The only thing I do know is that he has a family (friends included) that loves him so much. They've taken up camp in the hospital waiting room and the whole family posts on their blog, updating what's going on and how Jonathan is doing. I think it's amazing. The way people can pull together in times of need is amazing.

My grandma had surgery today. Her breast cancer came back and she had a mastecomy (sp) done. It really hurt to hear that...it hurt knowing there is nothing, absolutely nothing I can do from out here. My mom called me after surgery to let me know that things were ok. She's going to stay at my grandma's house for then next few days. The amazing thing is, the people at my Grandma's church are all pitching in and helping too. They're cooking and coming over - it's great. I remember them being there when my grandpa died. Again, people amaze me sometimes. Truly amazing.

Ok. with that said, I feel like I should do something productive. I'm going to make me some tea (because that's what you do if you live in England), turn the lights on, put on some good music and get cracking on my presentation.

Take care.

Friends

I realized this morning what friends are good for. Friends are good for bitching. Yup. Plain and simple bitching. Last night ALL I wanted to do was sit in the living room with the TV on having a cup of coffee and venting my latest 'boy' problems with my girlfriends. Problem was, my housemates were who knows where, and my friends from back home were...well...back home. That left me only my computer and journal.

Bitching, I believe, is healthy for you. Everybody gets pissed off and needs to vent every once in awhile, and your friends know this. They're there for you and listen to you complain and rant about the latest guy that screwed you over, or how your teacher didn't go to your 9am class - making you lose an hour that you could have been sleeping, they listen to you and don't judge you.

I miss the face to face gab time with my girls. It's not the same telling them a story over an email...you just don't get the full effect. I tell the friends I have out here about it, but they don't know the history. They weren't there when I first met the guy and was happy and laughing all the time, and they weren't there when I came home crying after being at his place...they don't know all that. My girls at home though...they know.

....i'm still feeling like crap, I've got the chills now, that follow with me being extremely hot. I'm going to try to sleep. Sleep is good. i've got another lecture at 2...I'm sure I'll write more later.

Oatmeal for Dinner

My plan for tonight was to make some dinner, put on a movie and fall asleep while watching it. My first problem with that plan was finding something for dinner. Since my throat is hurting I didn't find much that seemed worthy of going down my sore throat...Turns out when I went shopping on Saturday I was in a 'spicy' mood... I bought salsa, 'American Hot' pizza, 'Extra Spicy' speghetti sauce..you get the picture. So, I settled with some oatmeal.

Second problem with my plan. I was just putting my away message on AIM when my friend IM'd me. Now, normally I wouldn't have a problem saying that I don't feel well and I'm going to watch a movie - but i haven't talked to her since I left. Not only that, but I do believe she is the slowest typer EVER. Seriously. That's why I have time to write this - I'm waiting for her to type back.

I shouldn't complain. I like talking to friends back home. I really like it...except for those that just pop back into your life without any warning....like Dustin.

Yeah. He just randomly IM'd me the other day, totally out of the blue - what's up with that?! I haven't talked to him for 7 months. SEVEN MONTHS. I don't get it. *side note- that was the BEST oatmeal i've ever had...it was so good!!!! They don't have flavoured oatmeal out here* Ok. back on Dustin and the fact that I will never understand what the hell is going on in his head. I've known him for almost 3 years - THREE years, that's ridiculous! No, it can't be that long. No, I think it's only two. Thank goodness. Still, two years is a long time to be playing these stupid games.

Ok. I've gotta get out of this convesation with her. I need to sleep.

pocket change

I'm saving my money. I mean, really saving my money. I went shopping today and I think I should manage to keep the food for about two weeks, if I try hard. On Monday I'll find out if I got the job, my fingers are still crossed for it... If I got that job I would feel A LOT better about wanting to travel as much as I have planned.

When I was in Paris I made a list of places I want to go before I leave. I will do them. I will. I don't want to go home with one city still on that list. I'm excited beyond belief. Seriously, I'm going to be thrifty. Even when I'm traveling...I'm already thinking of ways to save money. For example: the next place I go i'm taking food with me. Eazy Mac. I took it to Paris and ate it for dinner one night. That saved me so much $$$. Genius. I'm coming up with other little tricks to. Maybe I'll write about them later.

My suitcase broke. I noticed it when I got it from the baggage claim in London. It had to have happened in route from Paris to London because when I zipped it up the final time, it was fine. Dammit. I'm going to ask around and see if anyone has something I can use when Natalie comes out - there's no way I'm taking my bigger suitcases - that's just travel suicide.

I'm at that wonderful point, again, where I don't miss home. Honestly, I really like it when I don't miss home - I'm so much happier. When I'm homesick it's just that...I physically feel ill... like nothing I do here will ever match up to home. It's a crazy feeling.

Ok. I can't think of anything too interesting to talk about - so I'm gonna go back to looking at rail tickets online.

Happy Valentine's Day

It's Valentine's day. Well, it is for the next 20 minutes or so. I got a card in the post from my mom. Oh man. I just admited to how much a loser I am. I'm 21 and the only Valentine I got was from my parents. Yikes....moving on....

Paris is tomorrow. I feel sorta indifferent to it right now. Then again, that's how I always get before trips. I make this huge deal leading up to them and then the day before it's like I don't really care. I think I have everything I need though. Most importantly, I have my adaptors and my multilingual phrase book that Abel (thank god) let me borrow before I left.

Why is it that people always seem to IM me RIGHT before I want to go to sleep. I mean, I've been online ALL day, but yet midnight seems to be a grand time to talk to me. Oh, right...there's a 7 hour difference, my mistake. Damn. Ok. Now i need to stop talking to them and get some sleep. Busy day tomorrow. I'm going to a country that hates Americans and doesn't speak Enlish!!!!!

Figures

Hemph. It figures that the journal I use isn't working now that I got this new blog. It's kinda frustrating though. Here I am, clicking refresh over and over trying to make the sign in page come up. And in the end there's nothing. Just a page that says "sorry, page cannot be found". Bummer.

I just finished watching Bridget Jones's Diary (the first one). I don't know if that's the best movie to watch A)right before Valentine's Day and B) if you're single C)if you're single right before Valentine's Day. Oh well. Fuck it. i'm out here...If anything, this can be my time to be single. Once I actually find a guy I won't be able to just pick up and leave to go to another country. Humm...unless he comes with me - then he'd just be perfect.

Ok. I'm gonna find something more productive to do...like take stupid quizzes that my friends made online.
Take my Quiz on QuizYourFriends.com!
Oh wow, and would you look at that... turns out I had enough time on my hands to make one of my own. What is this world coming to?

Escape

I never realized how many different blogs/journals there are online now. It's crazy - like this is the way communication is going. First people wrote real letters, then the telegram, phone calls, email, text messaging and now it's this.

It's interesting, we can sit in the privacy of our own rooms, or even in a busy computer lab, but once we sign on with our username and password to our very own journal the world is slowly shut out and it's just you and your computer.

What do people talk about? Anything and everything. I could say whatever the hell I feel like saying here...but do I? I don't know. I still have a gaurd up with these things because who knows who might be reading it. There's still that odd chance I could write something, just because I need to get it off my chest, and they might stumble upon it. But then what if subconciously I really wanted them to find it...

The internet is a tricky, scary place. But yet here I am, on yet another blog...typing away as though it's my own personal diary.